​It’s hard to take time for yourself when the calendar is full, but I’m learning that might be the perfect time to do so.
 
Recently, Rachel and I took an online course on self-compassion from experts Kristin Neff – if you’ve ever heard anyone referencing self-compassion, it was likely her! – and Chris Germer. They have been working together since 2010.
 
We didn’t have an extra 12 hours in our schedule, but making time for that course was worth it. We want to be the best human beings and project managers that we can be. We accomplish this by learning, growing, and expanding our thinking.

It can be hard to ask for help.

We have been programmed to believe that strength is individual, that asking for help is a sign of weakness.

This mentality, however, deprives us of the power that can come from working together, instead of alone.
At Reach Partners, we have observed that good leaders recognize that they can’t do everything alone.

We’ve seen that the best leaders take that one step further; they know how to ask for exactly what they need while empowering others to contribute.
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Here’s how that played out recently:

​When times and projects are rough, we have some advice: grab chocolate and a project manager.
 
It’s likely not surprising to you that we would recommend a project manager. The chocolate might be a bigger mystery. But eating chocolate (or another favorite treat) is one of the many ways leaders can ground themselves amid stress.
 
In recognition of this, here are three ways you can mitigate panic and stress when projects go awry. The following is good counsel for all of us. It’s an especially busy time for Anita and me. We hear it’s the same for our clients, trusted vendors and friends. While I write this for you, the advice is really for me.

​There’s a common saying that fences make good neighbors.
 
The underlying assumption is that people get along better when there is separation, that relationships need defined space.
 
We disagree.
 
Our best work happens when people break down those fences and come together. We believe that collaboration leads to the best ideas and the best path forward. We know from experience that we can do more together than alone.

​All it takes are five simple ingredients to add creamy flavor to fried potatoes and punch to baked salmon. Those same five ingredients can serve as a base for a scrummy potato salad and the unsung heroes of a BLT sandwich.
 
When you combine garlic, mustard, egg, oil and lemon, you get an unforgettable garlicky mayonnaise, also known as aioli. Those individual ingredients are certainly tasty, but they become magical when combined. By slowly adding oil while whipping the other ingredients, the liquids emulsify and create a custard-like spread. Yum!
 
Like mayo, the ingredients for a planning process are simple. Yet they form something new when combined. When blended,  purpose, people, time, communication, and action become key ingredients to projects, events and collaborations we deem successful.

​This year, Reach Partners celebrates 20 years.
 
Twenty years!
 
That’s countless hours of coordinating events, gathering people in conversation, helping work get done, communicating key messages, training volunteers, facilitating meetings, pushing and encouraging, staying within budget, outlining the scope, staying up late, waking up early, making mistakes, asking forgiveness, and making right the mistakes we made.
 
Twenty years!
 
As we celebrate this milestone, we recognize that we are who we are largely because of the values that we uphold and practice. We are intentional about how we do our work and who we do it with. This has led us to the best partners a business could ask for and we are immensely grateful for that.
 
So, in honor of our anniversary, we want to reflect on a few moments from the past two decades that speak to our values. Of course, there are so many more moments than we have space for, but here is a sampling:

I’ve always enjoyed reading, and I’ve become a better reader thanks to my book club. Armed with their encouragement and suggestions, I read a larger array of genres. I’ve also learned that I like to listen to audible books checked out through the library, a habit that recently led me to listen to Matthew McConaughey’s book, Greenlights.

It was okay, maybe even good. I listened to the book at normal speed the entire time, which is telling. That’s usually how I start an audiobook, but not how I end it. I either speed it up, wanting it to end soon or slow the tempo, wanting to bask in a text’s poetic beauty.

Still, let’s face it, it wasn’t a bad deal to have Matthew talk to me during drive time. Memoirs are not my favorite genre but I have found that I don’t get bored if it doesn’t follow a chronological order of the person’s life but tells stories centered around themes.
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But the part of the book that sticks with me is when McConaughey shared this observation: “If you know how, and when, to deal with life’s challenges – how to get relative with the inevitable – you can enjoy a state of success I call ‘catching greenlights.’”

My days are filled with communication distractions. Like many of you, I’m bombarded by messages via email, text, and phone. Even spoken conversations are often focused on a quick exchange of information before moving on to the next scheduled thing.

These experiences have motivated me to dig deeper for a better way of engaging with others: In a world full of noise, how do we invite meaningful conversations, the conversations that matter? And the follow-up question: Why are these types of conversations important? For human connection? For getting things done? For leading through social complexity?
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I think the answers to the latter is yes, yes, and yes.

I often struggle to know whether to say “yes” or “no” to a new experience. Even armed with details and expectations, I never truly know whether something will turn into an opportunity or an obligation.

In addition, I value clarity and purpose. When expectations are vague, I hesitate.
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And yet, sometimes ignoring the small voice in the back of my head that says “no” leads to valuable and meaningful connections. Sometimes my curiosity wins and I’m learning to pay attention.