How to Use Rituals to Build Better Connections

It’s relatively easy to think about ways that rituals unite, connect and motivate us. Imagine the ways your family celebrates and recognizes holidays. Picture how a sports team carries out a certain behavior or chant before competition starts. 

When done right, rituals are mindful actions that help us build community or identity. They create strong and long-lasting connections. 

As such, rituals have a place in supporting a healthy work environment among both teams and at the organizational level. Fun rituals that solve problems and do no harm can help to build effective teams and make the meetings they hold more productive. 

Every team has rituals, even if you don’t recognize them as such. We have rituals around hiring, recognition, production, innovation, quality, promotions, family, customer service, community service, learning, etc. 

Being intentional about those rituals can reinforce a business need or a team’s need for connection. Effective rituals fit your leadership style and the personality of your team – they feel natural. What works for one organization or team won’t necessarily build trust among another. 

Think about the Kiwanis Club. Can you imagine a meeting without music? This service club has a ritual of spontaneous singing, which leads to a spirit of cooperation. (And, let’s be honest: it may be the difference between a boring club and a lively one!) 

Rituals do not need to be complex or serious. They can be short and silly. The important thing to remember is that rituals should do no harm. If an activity introduces shame or humiliation, it will promote disconnection instead of unity.  

Here are some ideas for meeting rituals that can build up teams: 
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• Play a walk-up song – Encourage folks to show up on time by playing a signature song when it’s time for a meeting to start. Pick something that meets the personality of your team: maybe Wagner’s “Ride of the Valkyries,” or The Rolling Stones’ “Start Me Up.” One company I know had serious issues with people not showing up on time to the morning huddle. The team leads decided to have some fun with it by asking late-comers to sing a song like the national anthem, “Mary Had a Little Lamb” or “Jingle Bells.” 
  
  
• Recite company values – How many of us know our company values or mission? Enforce the mantra by turning key phrases into a pre-meeting chant.  
  
  
• Develop a team high-five or cheer – End every meeting on a high note by gathering everyone together for a group high-five or a motivating cheer. 
  
  
• Start on the right foot – If your team is still working on building psychological safety, start meetings with a connection ritual like Right Foot. Go around the table and ask each person to share why their day is starting on the “right foot.” For example, my day started on the right foot because … “my kids and I played board games together last night” or “I got to snuggle my niece’s new baby” or “Kevin Bacon retweeted me.” 
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• Name meeting roles – For every meeting, you need people to serve specific roles. Why not have some fun by naming them through the lens of your company values, brand archetypes or even your mascot. For example, your meetings may always have a Monkey Minder who collects actionable tasks and assignments. Or maybe you have a Focus Ferret who facilitates the meeting or a Note Goat who distributes the summary after the meeting is over.  

When done right, rituals can create an environment that encourages creativity, vulnerability and risk-taking. Make them count. 

–Rachel